Today is my 6 year dianniversary. Six years with this threatening, frustrating, complicated, draining disease. Sometimes I wonder why I ever was diagnosed with this disease. Some answers that people have told me is that I'm "strong" enough for it. But, I never really thought so. Many times, I become so overwhelmed that I just want to give up.
I was reminded last night, by my husband...that I am strong. He expressed to me that I am strong because he sees me every night wake up from a dead sleep and have to jab myself in the finger in order to test my blood sugar, or change my infusion site, or be woken up by my sensor numerous times throughout the night. He said "I know I wouldn't want to be doing that in the middle of the night--half asleep. You are strong." He reminded me that it really does take a strong person to be a diabetic. I think that is what I need in life (as well as other diabetics)...to be reminded that we're going to have days...weeks...months...that may be much more tough than others...and that doesn't make you a weak person. My husband reminded me at one of my weak moments...how strong I really am.
Six years & counting...
Wednesday, May 15, 2013
"You need to get to the hospital right now. Don't make any stops. Go from here to there immediately. Which hospital would you like to go to? I will call them and tell them you are on your way."
Panic set in when I heard the doctor at Emergency One tell me those five lines. I knew my life was going to change forever from the seriousness in his voice. Luckily, I had my boyfriend, soon to be fiancé/husband, by my side. I couldn't have handled it alone.
The next couple of days were a blur to me. I cannot describe in words the amount of confusion and stress that I felt. The lack of empathy from the doctors in the hospital was discouraging. They said my life was going to change drastically (which it was)...and that "this is your life now." They told me things I couldn't eat and activities I couldn't do.
I soon found out--that wasn't true. Yes, my life changed immensely. Yes, it is my life now. But I CAN do anything I want and eat anything I want. Just think, only a few days into being a Type 1 Diabetic...and I was hearing all the negatives (from doctors to say the least!)
This day will forever be engrained in my memory...like a song you can't get out of your head. I embrace this day because it showed me how strong I was. I was always so scared of needles, and then I had to learn to jab myself with a needle in a matter of a day! Yeah, I'd say that takes a pretty tough person!
Tuesday, May 14, 2013
Today’s prompt: Recently various petitions have been circulating the Diabetes Online Community, so today let's pretend to write our own. Tell us who you would write the petition to – a person, an organization, even an object (animate or inanimate) – get creative!! What are you trying to change and what have you experienced that makes you want this change?
As a person with a chronic illness, I believe the following:
We should not have to spend extra money on diabetic needs. Is it our fault that we have this disease? Don't we spend enough? Insurance companies should cover at least some (or all!) of the cost of the supplies we use on a daily basis.
Why should we have to spend our own money on supplies like batteries (for an insulin pump, sensor, test meter)? Why should we have to spend money on glucose tabs or fruit snacks to help us when we are having a low? What about the alcohol swabs...there's no insurance coverage on those either! Or how about the endless supply of bandaids that we need for our sensor? That all comes out of our wallet too. The pump clip that never lasts long...that is paid for out of pocket too.
It may not seem like a lot...but when you use these supplies literally every day of your life--it adds up! I am petitioning that these necessities be covered by insurance companies. I am lucky enough to have health insurance, but I really dislike that the insurance companies try and find a way to not cover certain supplies. These simple "things" aren't very "simple" in my life. They keep me alive...literally.
Monday, May 13, 2013
Today’s prompt: Often our health care team only sees us for about 15 minutes several times a year, and they might not have a sense of what our lives are really like. Today, let’s pretend our medical team is reading our blogs. What do you wish they could see about your and/or your loved one’s daily life with diabetes? On the other hand, what do you hope they don’t see?
I have to say, I can't complain about my doctors. My endocrinologists and PCP are amazing! Here's the reasons why:
*They fight for my diabetic needs and they are incredible advocates.
*When I get down on myself, they are there to reassure me that I'm doing great with managing my diabetes.
*They know me on a personal level, which is very comforting.
*They are there any time of the day and night.
*I don't get the whole "Well, this is your life now." (Like I use to get from other doctors)
*I hear "You CAN eat ANYTHING you want." (I have heard from other doctors, "You CAN'T eat this or that." Which is NOT true!)
However, if I had to pick something to share to my doctors, it would be this:
I would like them to know that I'm probably going to fail many times with managing my diabetes. I'll always pick myself up, because I'm strong [after all, it takes a strong person to be a diabetic!] I want them to know that it is the positive support that keeps me going. I wish other (not-so-great-ones) could realize how much of an affect they have on a person. Everything they say or do, can really make or break a PWD.
There have been cases where I will go to other specialists (doctors)...and they have no clue about diabetes. My advice to them--if you don't know anything about the disease, you should probably keep your mouth closed. I really could care less if you have MD at the end of your name.